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Title: Wedding Crashers
Author: backrose_17
Word Count: 31,421
Prompt: Wedding Crashers
Pairings/Characters: Jack/Ianto, John/Tosh, Harold Saxon/Gwen, Jake/Ace, some Grey/Ianto, Owen/Andy, Doctor/Martha and others
Rating: R
Beta: royalladyemma
Summary: Jack and John made a career out of crashing weddings looking for quick hook-ups, but one wedding changes everything when they meet Ianto and Tosh. Everything they know changes; have they finally found their perfect matches?
Warnings: Language and sexual scenes
Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood or the movie Wedding Crashers.

Chapter 5


A little while later


John was making balloon animals for the kids, and his current effort was an elephant. Once he was done he handed the finished elephant to a kid, leaving all the other kids impressed and wanting animals of their own. John began looking around for Tosh, the bridesmaid he had placed ‘dibs’ on at the ceremony. She looked at John from the corner of the room. “Okay, who’s next?” John asked the kids, knowing he needed to make a good impression on Tosh.


A bratty-looking kid pushed his way to the front of the crowd. “I want a bicycle,” he demanded.


“A bike takes too many balloons. Uncle John’s a little out of breath. How about a giraffe? Giraffe’s are cool.” John tried to reason with the kid.


The kid got right in John’s face and demanded again, “Make me a bicycle.” It was obvious that he was used to getting what he wanted, when he wanted it.


‘This is going to be a long day,’ John thought with a sigh as he began making the bike, all the while intensely aware of Tosh’s gaze.


Jack found himself smiling as he danced with the little flower girl, Mica, who was counting her steps, “One, two, three, step. One, two, three, step.”


“Tell you what. Why don’t you stand on my shoes and I’ll show you a few moves you can bust out on your classmates. Would you like that?” Jack offered.


Mica looked up at him with a bright smile. “Yes, please.” With that she stepped onto Jack’s shoes and he began moving around the floor like Gene Kelly. Mica was laughing and having the time of her life, much to the envy of the several big girls, who would have loved to dance, and more, with Jack.


At the edge of the dance floor, Ianto was watching the scene with fondness and he smiled at Jack when he caught the other man’s gaze. Jack smiled back at him before dipping Mica, who giggled with delight.


Ianto wasn’t the only one watching Jack and Mica; Gwen slid onto the dance floor next to the dancing man and little girl. “Let’s see how you do with someone your own age,” she purred.


‘I’m half your age, lady.’ Jack mentally snorted and fought back the urge to say that out loud to Gwen. Instead he smiled graciously, if not a little warily, at her, “I think I’m up to the challenge.” He then turned his attention to Mica, bowing down before her. “Save me a dance later?” and he winked at the little girl who promised she would before dashing off to tell all her friends about her grown-up dancing.


Jack spun Gwen out onto the dance floor and made very sure to keep a respectful distance from the woman. “So, how long have you and Defence Minister been married?” Jack asked trying to get some info.


“Oh, thirty years next April.” Gwen commented dismissively, clearly not all that interested in talking about her marriage.


“Wow.” Jack had to admit that was a long time.


“Yeah, and we were faithful for two of them.” Gwen purred into Jack’s ear while getting a quick grope of his ass. It took all of Jack’s willpower not to recoil from the woman’s unwanted touch.


John was out of breath as he handed the boy his elaborate balloon bicycle. Tosh joined the group and smiled at John. “You’re good.”


“This is nothing. Yesterday I made my grandma a new house. Real nice one, too. With a pool.” John joked.


Tosh laughed and leaned in close to him. “Okay, then, I’ll take a sports car.” She teased and her eyes lit up with laughter.


“Or how about a dance instead?” John offered her his hand.


“That’s what I really wanted.” Tosh slipped her hand into John’s and the two moved to the dance floor.


Having finally escaped Gwen’s clutches, Jack was carrying on a conversation with Harold Saxon.


“So you read my paper on the need to expand Torchwood to other countries?” Harold was deeply impressed by this man.


Jack took a sip of his drink before responding to the question. “Of course. Read it while I was sailing my boat to Bermuda.”


That piqued Harold’s interest even more. “Ah, a sailor. Good man. Hey, you didn’t happen to catch my speech about why UNIT’s new airship, the Valiant, is a must?”


Jack hid a smile; with this answer he would be in good with Ianto’s father and thus one step closer to his goal. “Are you kidding me? It was brilliant! Now if only everyone else weren’t so short-sighted.” Jack praised.


“Yes, yes! So short-sighted.” Harold agreed, putting his arm around Jack’s shoulders. “Jack, what do you say you and I head out to the deck and light up a couple of cigars?”


“Nothing would make me happier, sir.” Jack grinned accepting the man’s offer.


Out on the dance floor, John and Tosh were dancing to a slow song and John was spinning his tale. “And you saved his life?” Tosh whispered in awe.


“Yeah, but some others weren’t so lucky. It still shakes me up to talk about it.” John said in a carefully rehearsed tremulous breath.


“I’m sorry.” Tosh wanted to comfort the man; she pulled him in closer to her for a quick hug, completely missing the look of satisfaction that flashed in John’s eye for a brief second.


In a slightly choked up voice John continued. “It’s okay. It’s just… we lost some really good men, friends.” John stopped dancing and looked down. “If you’ll excuse me, I think I need to get some air.” He pulled away from Tosh and shook her hand. “It was nice meeting you.” John made his way to the exit and headed for the beach.


John walked slowly along the beach heading towards the ocean and in the distance he could hear the echoing call of, “John! Wait up.” Smiling to himself John slowed down, letting Tosh catch up to him. ‘Hook, line and sinker. She’s all mine.’ John knew he had Tosh in his grasp.



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